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I realize how much I miss writing after a severe hiatus to pursue an advancement in my career. People have asked why I don’t pursue writing full time. My answer is always the same: when writing supports my family is when I can write full time. My status in life has changed little in the year I have been away, save for a few different things: I now covet a Baccalaureate in Nursing from Grand Canyon University and I am single. I’ve learned a few things on my journey to this day: I am stronger than I think I am. I can only multitask so much. And when life happens my true passion suffers.
After being away from my craft for so long I found just how easy it was to walk away. With a manuscript collecting dust for two years, and ideas dwindling, I was okay with being out of the game. In fact, it was comfortable. Without my head buried in a computer, fingers growing callous, and wrists feeling the strain of carpal tunnel, I found more time to do much of nothing.
Once school was completed in July my time became wide open and I vowed to tinker with some ideas. That never happened. Writing is comparable to getting in shape; it’s hard to get into a routine, but once in a routine each day is easier. Falling out of the routine means starting from scratch. Starting from scratch is painful, but I vowed to do it.
For the first year in my life, I jumped on the NaNoWriMo wagon. If I’m going to get back in shape might as well go all out. The last novel I completed was in 2012, it sat in editing limbo falling victim to the time constraints of higher education. My first exercise at hand was to get that off my desk. Second was to run through many ideas I had jottedd down over the years and pick one. Third was to create a NaNo account. Fourth was to open my computer back up on November first. I’m back! I’m back and I’m loving every minute. Here’s to writing a novel before I head back into the education system for 18 more months.
Every day we live, we learn. If you think you know everything about yourself then you are most certainly wrong. Opinions change from day to day, and one simple bad experience, or one wonderful great experience can sway you in an entirely different direction.
There are paths in life; some you chose, some you follow, some are pre-designed. For example; my daughter was adamant that she would hate surf school, that she would drown, be left out in the big waves alone, and most likely die. After much convincing, and the promise that she only had to try once then could walk away, she gave it a go. Wouldn’t you know (because I knew) that she loved it!
We just don’t know what we can do until we do.
I for one appreciate poetry, but a poet I am not. My brain thinks in long strands with elaborate situations, much to wordy for poetry. Then I had a two day run with messing up my internal sleeping clock. Day two was quite unique in that I promptly fell asleep at 9 p.m. then promptly woke up at 1 a.m. Wide awake! About 3 a.m. I was able to fall back asleep, but by 4 a.m. my brain was back on. Well, I assume it was back on, though the part of the brain that tells the body its awake was off. I remember 4 a.m. like I remember 10th grade geometry.
But there on my phone was proof that some kind of electrical function was fusing at 4 a.m. Three poems on my phone, all written within 45 minutes of each other. Three very very different poems from heartache to funny to surreal all stared at me at 7 a.m. with the option to “save.” I was amazed; dumbfounded! They weren’t half-bad and one made me laugh. Maybe I’ll be sleep deprived a few more days, because apparently I’m only a poet at 4 a.m.
Tania L Ramos
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