The Pain of Productivity

changes Ever wish there was more time in the day? Maybe in the year? How about your life? I’m torn. On the one hand I can’t wait until the end of the day when I can sleep it off. On the other hand there isn’t enough time to get everything done.

What is my life? Well, in 2011 when I was on disability my life consisted of writing and attending court every other day. It was miserable and wonderful all rolled into one. In one regard I was able to follow my dream of writing, in the other it was a tragic and devastating year for my entire family … makes for great writing though.

In 2012, I returned to the work force, albeit it was a slow transition. After the dark year of 2011 there were many changes in my life, the biggest being the newly shared custody of my sweet baby girl, whose father moved over an hour and a half from me. That was a game changer. I took an on-call position with no benefits or paid time off, yet worked full time hours and more. I was also thrust into having to commute weekly to pick up my daughter. Since my time with her was now shared, I found it difficult to give away the time we had together to doing anything other than being with her. This left me with zero writing time.

Do you know what happens when you have zero writing time? The voices go away. They don’t disappear per say, they simply grow quiet and go down to a low lull. I still hear them, and they still beckon me, but I have to put them off to be a responsible adult and manage my home and family. Single mom status is not as glamorous as Hollywood makes it out to be.

So during NaNoWriMo month I pledged to start writing. How did that turn out? Epic fail! 500 words, and it was more venting through characters than actual story line. Then the night before Thanksgiving I was hit with something exciting: the stomach flu. What good can from the stomach flu? Well, after realizing I would be living in the bathroom for 24 hours it occurred to me that I could spend that time productively. So, I grabbed a copy of Be Still and a red pen, and while my intestines slowly died I edited my book. TMI? Too bad.

The moral of the story is: I have to be in physical or emotional pain to be productive. So here’s to all of you who can relate … out of the ashes rises the Phoenix.

Tania L Ramos, RN and author who’s finally on solid foods


2 responses to “The Pain of Productivity

  1. I can relate to not being able to write in November. For me feeling like I have to write and write a certain amount just sucks away my creativity.

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