Today my book went live. Wait! I’m not ready. The promotional flyers I ordered arrived yesterday and wouldn’t you know it, I put the wrong website. And that, my friends, is why you should not write a promotional flyer at one a.m. Take it from me, 25 flyers short and several dollars in shipping and handling later, it is better to be awake and create a flyer than be sleepy and create crapola.
But hey, Iuniverse said–clearly stated–“your manuscript will go live in 10-15 days.” I had time, right? That was on Monday. According to my mathematical skills when your carry the cosign and multiple by 25 erroneous flyers and divide by one frazzled nurse and multiply by 10-15 days, you get 4. That’s right, you get four days. Unlike my friends who hitchhiked the galaxy to discover the answer was 24. Those who have read the book or seen the movie get the inuendo, those that haven’t please click the link and read the book…AFTER you have read mine of course.
So, “Be Still,” is now live on the iuniverse website and it is time to see if all those royalty complaints are true. It is time to start sending out those press release kits and time to recruit some volunteer mailers, researchers, and publicists. Anyone need a job? Well, my son was voluntold that he will be my Junior Marketer, to start, he took several flyers to school today, and for that he can continue to play his assassin games on Xbox. Seriously, it is time to pick up the pace and get my book out there. It is time to put my words into action. Time to go forward into the great unknown (cue patriotic music), to succeed at the all American Dream, to find glory in knowing my talent can bring happiness to others or maybe just make someone say, “hmmm.” I will boldly go where no writer has gone before, and if for someone reason I do not make it back then I have but one request...buy the book in remembrance of me.